Rejection, Wrapped

Why 2024 is my "year of rejection" and what we can all do to not be rejected as much...

To the 100+ new subscribers over the past few weeks, welcome! Today’s post is a fun and (hopefully) useful one.

I. The Year of Rejection

As I hustle to holiday parties, end-of-year work meetings, trains, and airplanes, I find myself reflecting on 2024, trying to categorize what this year will be called in my book of life.

I called 2022 the “Year of Transition”.

I think I will call this year the “Year of Rejection” not particularly because I faced rejection more this year than in past years but because my perception of rejection shifted in a freeing way. This year, I was able to effectively depersonalize the experience of rejection, taking the word “no” less as a personal affront to who I am and what I offer and more as a celebratory marker of a life lived on the foundation of chance.

There is a story I love about an acquaintance who was raised as a Jehovah’s Witness. She’d spend her weekends with her parents knocking on doors around Pennsylvania, trying to convert others to her family’s religion. Most neighbors were unwilling listeners and so she grew up watching the door slam in her face again and again. Today, she says, she is grateful for those weekends because rejection no longer feels like anything at all.

Those who know me well know that I often email people I come across that I think are cool. Cold emails (and this blog) have become my favorite habits. The conversations I get to have, the people I get to meet, and the friends I get to make by “shooting my shot” have added depth to my world. But with all cold emails, for every conversation with someone amazing that I get to have, there are often many more emails left unanswered. Here’s a Spotify-wrapped-style breakdown of this year’s cold email attempts.

II. Rejection, Wrapped

III. The Anti-Rejection Guide

Techies would say I’ve A-B tested my way to successful cold emails. The most common request I get from friends is what my cold emails look like. Here’s what I’ve learned so far.

If you set one goal for 2025, I hope it’s to email someone you admire and tell them why you look up to them. Then ask them to meet. Trust me, it will be worth it. If you do so, let me know!